Tuesday, December 7, 2010

For Grandma

      My niece made the mistake of friending[1] me on Facebook. It’s a funny story. About two years ago I tried to friend her, but she told me that she had a strict policy of not friending relatives. I respected that until I received a friend request from a distant relative whom I had never met in person. After confirming this middle aged Jewish man living somewhere in Florida was actually a cousin, I checked who was on his friend list before accepting his invitation. Sure enough, there was my sixteen-year-old niece. Hmmmm……..So that’s what time it is! I gave her a good ribbing, but let it go.

         Fortunately a year later she tried to friend me, to which of course I answered that I have a strict policy of not accepting friendship invitations from self-absorbed teenage nieces. Okay, I wasn’t that mean but I did consider reporting her as a stalker. It was payback time after all. But accepting her friendship was the gift that kept on giving. She keeps on posting teen-angsty comments, practically begging for snarky comments. Take yesterday for example:

Niece’s Status: “There is a thing, formless yet complete”
My comment: “Yeah I think I drank a 5th of that last night - it was yummy”

I’m faced with a dilemma, she posted the following status today: “Treat everything you perceive as a dream”.


Please, I’m open to suggestions.        

[1] I don’t know when this became a bona fide verb, but it is so I’m using it. For you grammatical purest (yes Dad that means you) considered yourself “poned”.


  1. Hahaha. You simply have to remember how you were at that age. I'm sure you wouldn't feel the need to comment as much.

    Or maybe not. At least you're funny. :-)


  2. You could play a game of status post one-upmanship. A quick search for 'dreamy quotes' will provide some inspiration.

    For example, when she posts, "I am falling, yet drifting on purple," you can reply, “With crimson juice the thirsty southern day, Sucks from the hills where buried armies lie...”

  3. @Fickle Cattle- It's actually wonderful to have niece(s) that I can be so playful with.
    @James- good ideas but I'm afraid it might go over their heads....(I hope you girls are reading this :-p from Uncle Corey)

    @My nieces- doesn't it just drive you crazy that I didn't mention which one of you was the subject of that last comment?